Jewish culture has often been associated with progressive politics, especially in the United States. Jews were some of the most common white supporters of the rights of people of color in the integration debate of the 1960's. Jews have always been present in demonstrations of anti-war protest, at the forefront of the gender equality movement and most recently in the acceptance of equal rights for same-sex couples. Still, there are a few cultural sticking points that keep Jewish culture within a somewhat conservative state of mind. The most prevalent belief is that Jews should only ever marry and have children with other Jews. What place does this belief have in modern American (or even global) society and is it still a valid point of view?
The most common impetus for the insistence of marriage within the faith is that a solidly Jewish home is essential to the preservation of Jewish religion and culture within that home. It's true that the majority of Jewish ritual revolves around the everyday aspects of family life, rather than beyond the home in synagogues and other Jewish organizations. Many practices, from affixing a mezuzah to the door, to keeping a kosher kitchen and observing the rituals of a Shabbat dinner, are wholly dependent on the level of dedication a family has to their faith. Plainly, there is no Judaism without a Jewish home.
Naturally, this begs the question, "Is it possible and practical to maintain all Jewish traditions within an interfaith home?" Well, that depends on a number of decisions an interfaith couple will have to make together. If one of the partners practices a different faith, do those practices interfere with or contradict the Jewish practices? Does that faith teach a conflicting moral code or worldview? More to the point, to what extent does a parent's faith influence the faith of a child?
The truth is that these are all case-by-case issues. It's irresponsible to apply a one size fits all attitude to any aspect of marriage or child-rearing. It's certainly possible for a modern individual to practice his or her own religion without conflict with the practices of his or her partner, though as with all aspects of a healthy relationship this requires honesty, solid communication and the utmost respect.
As for how an interfaith home might affect the expectations a child perceives for his or her self concerning religion, this is the most complex issue at hand. The biggest fear inherent to this debate is that a child may feel like he or she is being asked to choose between parents by choosing one faith or the other. It's also likely that the child simply won't form a connection to either faith and choose to live a secular life, or to adopt a faith that appeals to them outside the home.
Which brings us to the final and ultimately most important question: Is it right or even meaningful to impose a religion upon a child rather than allowing him or her to choose a system of beliefs? In today's increasingly global, heterogeneous society, do we help or harm our children by instilling them with a sense of distinct, though inherently isolating heritage? For our purposes as Jews, can we even really call a person a Jew if he or she never really chose to live a Jewish a life, but lived one by default?
After all the communal concerns and the pressures of heritage have been expressed, we have to accept that faith is a matter of personal devotion. If one finds it too difficult to be a Jew whenever conditions are less than ideal for Jewish practices, that merely calls that individual's devotion into question. Though community is essential to the Jewish experience, the extent to which each individual is a Jew is dependent on that individual's passion and practice. As for our children, we cannot make Jews of other people, we can only choose to be Jews ourselves and use our knowledge to educate those who wish to learn.